Message from Crystal

I have wanted to write on this blog for so long. As you all can imagine, this has been a difficult time of my life. Being an oncology nurse has actually worked against me at this time. I have seen so much that it makes it difficult to keep a positive attitude but I continue to work on this on a daily basis. I am so fortunate to have such a wonderful support system. It never fails that the days that I am feeling "not so positive", there is always someone in my life who is positive for me. Jason, who is my ROCK, is always there to remind me that I need to stay strong and keep a positive attitude.

I started off getting a regimen of 6 weeks of chemotherapy and radiation. This was difficult because I went for treatment five days a week. After this, I was scheduled for additional radiation that extended my regimen by a few weeks.

It has been three weeks since I had my last radiation. I have had my ups and downs but overall my energy level is returning. I will start a new regimen of chemotherapy treatment on February 23. There are pros and cons to the new regimen. The pros are that it is only once every three weeks, after going to treatment 5 days a week for 6 weeks, this will be nice. I will have several days where I will be feeling the side effects of the chemo, but the rest of the days should be more tolerable. The worst part of the new regimen is that I will lose my hair within the first 10 days of treatment. I am trying to mentally prepare myself for this. I want to be in control of when I lose my hair so I plan on cutting it before it starts coming out.

I had a Pet Scan on Monday, February 9 to see how everything is looking in my abdomen and to make sure the cancer has not spread any more. I will get the results on Thursday. This Pet Scan will not show if the tumor is shrinking because there is still too much inflammation from the radiation in my pelvis. I will get another Pet Scan in May, this one should give us more information as to whether or not the tumor has responded to the treatment.

I am in California right now. We came here to baptize Aiden and Rylee. When I found out I had cancer that was one of the first things I wanted to do. I wanted to make sure the kids had some spiritual direction. We baptized the kids in the morning at a historic church in Downtown Los Angeles called La Placita. We had planned to have the reception in my parent's backyard but when there was rain in the forecast my dad made a quick move and changed the venue. We ended up having a beautiful reception at the Pasadena Hilton. There was about 70 people there, lots of family and close friends. It meant so much to me to have everyone there to share in this special day.

Another thing that is very important to me is journaling. While I have been on my one month recovery, I have been journaling for Jason and the children. If I am not there for them, I want them to know who their mother is and what my hopes and dreams are for them.

I am still trying to figure out if there is a lesson to be learned in all of this. If I had to say right now....never take one moment for granted. The next time you find yourselves complaining about something, take the time to ask yourselves what is "REALLY" important? Slow down, take time to stop and enjoy life, tell the people around you that you love them. The one thing that makes it somewhat worthwhile is when my story has made someone think about how they can make a positive change in their life.

Thank you so much for your love and support. I am so touched by your positive thoughts, prayers and words of encouragement. Please keep them coming!!

{Crystal}